MAKING HERMAN
Latest entry: Entry 32,
Friday August 12, 2005
Entry 28. By David,
Tuesday September 21, 2004
Back from the Supanova
Pop Culture Expo in Brisbane, where the FINAL CUT
of HERMAN
played for the first time... six times, I think, over the
two days of the convention. "Nakedfella Productions"
(that's me) had a booth there, where we (I) was selling comics,
shirts and, somehow, a Knight Rider poster I put up in the
booth because it looked a bit bare. I may find it a bit strange
that there are people who'll pay $12 for a ratty, pinhole-punctured
poster of David Hasselhoff I probably got out of a showbag
in the late '80s (respect the 'hoff), but there's stupider
things to do with your money... like, say, paying $35 for
an autograph. Even if it's Sallah's.
I sat around, I drew some sketches for people,
I ate apples (and junk food, fine), I sold stuff. A nice (if
tiring) weekend, punctuated by meeting a LOT of people, notably
Patrick
Alexander and his CORNER OF AWESOMENESS crew (what
a bunch. They're like a multimedia A-Team, or Captain Planet
and the Planeteers without the useless "Heart" guy),
portions of the PHATSVILLE and SPORADIC
teams, Dan Beeston of INVISIBLE
SPIDERS, Brad Daniels of GROOVY GRAVY, Mr. J (a
man of whom I had heard much but seen nought -- beautiful
art), Stewart McKenny, Travis Burch, Luke
Weber, the excellent organisers, Daniel Zachariou
and Tim McEwen, and a veritable truckload of strange people
in strange costumes. Personal to the guy in the Harley Quinn
outfit: you didn't show up, so I gave your mate's poster to
somebody else. Sorry.
The HERMAN screenings seemed to go very well.
I sat in for one of them (only one? Had to man the booth and
all), and it was interesting hearing the younger members of
the audience giggling at the jokes and awwwing the cute dog,
and the depraved comics people sniggering at the "Magnum"
cameo and whore references. Very interesting. I'm looking
forward to checking out more audience reactions.
I came home and this was waiting for me:
Dear Mr Blumenstein,
Thank you for the opportunity
to consider this program for broadcast on ABC TV.
Unfortunately, we have been unable to find a suitable place
for this short in our schedule
and must therefore pass on your offer.
We wish you every success.
Kind regards,
<A PERSON'S NAME>
<A PERSON'S TITLE>
ABC TV
Since the ABC is the government-run station, I consider it
a failure of the current government. Would a Labor-run ABC
reject HERMAN? Yeah, probably. There's a lot of episodes of
THE BILL they haven't run yet. Never mind. There are always
other options. Hell, SBS
shows INSPECTOR
REX...
Entry 29. By David,
Wednesday November 3, 2004
Date: Sun, 17 October 2004
From: David Blumenstein <david@nakedfella.com>
To: mail@overthefence.com.au
Subject: "No smoking representation"
Hi,
Can you clarify what you mean
by that requirement in your entry guidelines? I'm assuming
it means no sponsored appearances by tobacco products, which
I can understand, but it occurred to me that you might mean
"no showing smoking in your film". That's not
the case, is it?
Cheers
David Blumenstein
Date: Mon, 18 October 2004
From: mail@overthefence.com.au
To: David Blumenstein <david@nakedfella.com>
Subject: Re: "No smoking representation"
That is correct David.
No cigarettes being puffed, lit up, rolled, played with
or even a pipe. representation in your film? We had two
films in the festival last year which had someone smoking
the filmmakers simply edited out the sequence. Do you have
smoking
Cheers Greg
Date: Mon, 18 October 2004
From: David Blumenstein <david@nakedfella.com>
To: mail@overthefence.com.au
Subject: Re: "No smoking representation"
Hey Greg
Yeah, there's couple smoking
bits, inc. a long sequence with a Mafia boss doing a monologue
while smoking/holding a cigar, shortly before he gets his
ass kicked by a Labrador (the film's animated). Not really
stuff I can cut, annoying because I hate smoking. Is this
a requirement of your sponsor? How about if I did an animated
disclaimer to go before the film, along the lines of:
---
V/O MAN
The following film contains images of people smoking, contrary
to the regulations of this film festival. To make up for
this, here is the film's star to tell you why smoking is
bad and unhealthy.
<Herman appears. He is a
Labrador dog wearing pants. He sits on a large stage in
front of an enormous "NO SMOKING" sign>
HERMAN
Woof. Woof woof woof. Woof woof.
<Still images of dead lungs,
rotten teeth and vomit appear behind him>
HERMAN
Woof woof. Woof.
V/O MAN
The filmmaker would like to add that he hates smoking, has
never smoked himself and always wants to punch those arseholes
who stand in the taxi rank outside the casino smoking big
stinky cigars. Also, all the characters in this film that
smoke are idiot posers or murderers.
HERMAN
Woof.
V/O MAN
Thank you for your time.
---
How does that sound?
Cheers
David
Apparently not good enough, as I haven't heard back. I think
this might be one of those cases of "POLITICAL CORRECTNESS
GONE AWRY".
Entry 30. By David,
Tuesday February 1, 2005
Welcome back to Hermantown for 2005. Some things
have happened since I last posted here, things I did mention
on the front page of nakedfella.com. Might I quote and paraphrase?...
-
"Herman" bought to screen on SBS'
eatcarpet
program. This is not as good as a double-header with "Inspector
Rex" but still pretty nice.
-
Film festivals: "Herman" was just on at the
Tromadance
Film Festival in Utah (yes, run by Troma,
who made "Toxic Avenger" pts. I - IV), and will
show in March at the Cinequest
Film Festival in San Jose, CA.
-
Art exhibitions: "Herman" art will be visible
at two upcoming exhibitions, specifically THE INK RUNS
DEEP DOWN, DOWN UNDERGROUND, a comics exhibition in Orange,
NSW curated by comics mensch Glenn Smith, and a zine-fest
here in Melbourne (Hawthorn, to be exact) called ARE YOU
GOING TO BUY THAT? Both promise to be interesting and/or
good fun, and visitors may get to watch the film, too.
If you're wondering what form the art would take: I'm
taking the original inked backgrounds I drew for the film
and overlaying them with printed character art, thereby
producing original black-and-white stills. They look pretty
neat, and they will be the start of my canny plan to sell
my artwork for ludicrously high prices just like every
other dinky
cartoon-style
artist.
-
You'd think work would be going ahead on the "Herman"
DVD, and actually it is. I'm piecing together the very
exciting Dogs Of Law music video at the moment. It'll
be quite hyper and disjointed and multimedia and will
feature dragons and Nintendo gaming and a hairy man in
a wifebeater and bits from the film just like every other
movie tie-in clip you've ever watched. Would you like
to see what the Nintendo bits will look like?
CLICK
HERE!
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